Proclamation on the Play Date
Including but not limited to those children in my home during Spring Break.
- Food will be served at the approved time only. Any visit longer than two hours will have at least one healthy snack. Rummaging through my pantry is forbidden. Rummage prevention is appreciated by visitors because offspring are primary culprits.
- Conversing with me, the parent, is tolerated on a limited basis. Please don't try to have a conversation with me. You are at my home to prevent my own kid from talking my ear off.
- Television viewing is an unapproved activity unless the playdate is annoying. Be forewarned, if the visitor is invited to watch television, it will be the last time it comes over.
- All girl children are subject to hair control. Any straggly hair will not be tolerated. It is entirely possibly that you have been invited to my home primarily to feed my beauty control issues because I've been dying to get that hair out of your face for ages.
- Bring personal items to my house at your own risk. Know that any toys brought to my house are bound to be victims of the Black Hole phenomenon. Parents will not be allowed upstairs to search for the toy. Upstairs is off-limits for any adult not sharing my blood.
- Visitor must exit at preapproved time. Any begging for more time or hiding from parents will be grounds for lifetime banishment.
- Underwear must be worn with any and all dress-up clothes.
- If Alice is napping, all children are invited to play downstairs or outside. If the baby is woken by children, visitors will be subject to Psychotic Mommy.
- Mommies don't play with children. Mommies do jobs. See item 2.
- Any playdate at my house will need to be reciprocated soon. Like tomorrow.
Any child who can occupy any or all of my children outside for great lengths of time is welcome to stay indefinitely.
Please enjoy your visit.
I wonder why my kids aren't more popular. Hmm.
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33 comments:
I like you rules. I think I will adopt them, if my kids ever wanted to have their friends over, but that's a different subject all together!
What if I am your playdate and Mimi is my chaperone? Am I still forbidden from looking in the pantry?
Your rules are perfectly reasonable. I think that because they sound like my rules except for the hair thing. No one with stringy hair but me in this house.
I had a friend whose parents made me do chores when at their house. I draw the line at making friends clean toilets. No wonder that friendship never lasted.
Sounds like you are really enjoying spring break. only 12 more days to go. Enjoy!!!
I fully agree with (and laughed about) each and every rule. I intend on copying it off and posting it on a wall for our upcoming Spring Break. I am going to change the "upstairs" part (in #5) to, "the bedrooms" since we live in a ranch, not a 2 story. Even though I only have sons...I am still have to worry about the underwear and the dressup part.
Seriously Celia, You are so funny! Again and again I am amazed by it!
So let it be written, so let it be done! I'm so with you on these.
Then again my kids don't really ask to have friends over anymore. Hmmm...
You forgot Rule 11--no following Mommy into the bathroom. No matter what.
p.s. What is a servidor?
p.p.s. The song you mentioned is my mom's favorite. That's WHY we're going...
I will copying and pasting said ground rules.
I'm soooo not the playdate mommy that people like. I turn on the TV or tell them to go upstairs away from me. I sometimes try harder than that, but let's me honest... it's rare. Kids play much better on their own without me telling them how and what to play.
And the rummaging through the pantry? HATE IT.
if i lived in your neckatha woods, i would make it my personal mission to sneak into the upstairs of your house, take pictures, and blog about it.
you've taught me well, oh wise one. she who is sly is funny. thank whatever god you worship that miles separate us.
Those rules are in full force at my house too, except I probably couldn't have stated them as wittily (is that even a word) as you did!
I have a testimony of the truthfulness of all your rules. God bless you.
11. NO bringing over sick kids, even if you think I won't notice they are sick, or you have diagnosed them as "not contagious."
(Un-bathed kids fall somewhere between sick kids and unkempt hair.)
These will be posted on my front door for the entire summer! I especially agree with rule number 1. I'd been considering enforcing kitchen hours - last summer was like a 3 month long feeding frenzy, and I can't take it again.
Here's my additional rules
If you tattle, you are out the door.
Same, if you whisper to my kid to tell me to get everyone a snack. go home, why don't you?
If a neighborhood kid comes over that I like more than you, your little butt will be recycled on out.
If I notice an increase is sassiness or snottiness in my own kids-you are also voted off the island.
I am having flashbacks to my own childhood and my mother's very similar rules! LOL
I will adopt some of those rules in my own household, along with Ashley's rules, because I HATE when parents send their sick kids to my house, to school, or to church. Because I always get sick even if my child doesn't!
(I just popped over from my sister, Diane's blog)...I am laughing so hard that I think I might pee my pants! Ain't it the truth!?! I had a child rummage through my fridge and dump a WHOLE pitcher of newly made juice ALL OVER MY FLOOR. The mom stood there and watched me clean it up...that was IT for that kid.
A-MEN sister!!!!!! Especially #2!!!! I believe I may print these rules out & post them on my front door.
Last night when I posted this I felt nervous that everyone would know that I truly am a mean mom. I'm glad other people are on board, because all I can think of today is rules for adolescent visitors.
Love the rules. I am with the tattling rule too. HATE THAT! I also hate it when kids come to the house and immediately answer they are hungry, but here is the rub, my own son does this at other's homes, much to my chagrin because he truly believes everyone else has better food than us. Oh yeah, and the hair thing? Just let me at that tangled mess. Don't you dare come to my house with stringy, messy hair! Don't even sit by me at church with that mess or I might whip out my hairbrush and ponytails! Yes, I have messy little girl hair issues.
Great rules!!! Totally agree with all of them and the additonal ones added by fellow commenters. I hate tattling big time!
Har, har, snort, giggle! These are the best rules ever.
I like outside friends too. And psychotic mommy retaliation for nap waker-upers is only fair.
I have had many a neighbor child give me the look like I am evil, but they woke the baby and must be punished.
What? You are not mean! Us moms really should only have to endure so much. I always make my kids stay outside or downstairs in the playroom when they have friends over! BTW- why is your spring break 12 days long! That would put ANYONE under!
Love the rules. Children, either my own or others, rummaging in my pantry is a HUGE pet peeve. Can't stand it. The underwear on....that's a rule at our house too. Too often it actually needs to be enforced.
It's BEAUTIFUL. I am going to print copies on parchment paper and nail them to the doors of all my neighbors a la Martin Luther circa 1517 (or whatever).
Amen, and Amen! You. Are. Brilliant. You just said what so many moms think. If I were you, I think I'd add Heather's ammendments, copywright that, and make posters like the "everything I needed to know, I learned in Kindergarted" sort of thing and sell them. Work it up. You would make loads!
Well done.
When my kids tell me I'm so MEAN I just reply "Thanks, that means I'm doing my JOB!" LOL!
I really LOVE your rules! I have several of the same issues with several of the 9 and 10 year olds in our neighborhood. They think they live here and can eat or drink anything they want.
I've thought about charging money for bottles of gatorade, juice boxes, and other lunch items that seem to disappear when I'm not looking. I never seem to have what I need for school lunches. Maybe I should put it all under lock and Key!
FYI, your blog is taking longer to load these days. I think it's because of the subscribe tool or the new search tool. Both vanities.
Nor, you are right. It does take longer to load. I took the subscribe buttons off. Does that help?
Ok, maybe it would help to put in a vending machine for treats. A little additional income.
Two big pet peeves are when you've invited said friend over for a play date and her mother brings her over and asks if her little sister can stay too. Then that same little sister immediately complains to her mom how hungry she is...in front of you...and her mom asks if you could please get little sister a snack!
Ugh...I can't stand it when anyone other than myself goes through my pantry. I would die if I knew my kids did that at someone else's home.
Love rule #7...there must be a story behind that.
Comment from my nine year old son: "31 comments? Wow, let me read them. How does she get so many people to read and post comments?" This coming from my son who gets zero to three comments on his posts from his cousin blog.
Thanks for the rules. Please let me know of any modifications as the week progresses. Our Spring Break doesn't start until next Friday, the 28th. Yeah, I know random Spring break date. One week after Easter and one week after Viernes Santo.
Um, all my kids were laying on the floor watching a video when we left last time.
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