For those of you living under a rock, Jennifer Lopez delivered twins last Friday. She's married to Marc Anthony. We're glad she's married and the babies are born and everything, but I need to talk about the names. I have strong feelings.
Rumor has it that the boy baby is named Max and the girl baby is named Emme like those kids in Dragon Tales. Doesn't J Lo have a stylist or something who can help her with these things? Doesn't anyone around her watch PBS?
I have a son named Max (actually Maxwell). I don't regret naming him that, although Max is the number one name for dogs. Bow wow. Max Anthony, although it sounds good initially, has some problems.
First of all, Max Anthony sounds too much like Marc Anthony, who is the father. People are going to get mixed up.
Second, I consider Max a nickname. If they were really cool, they would have named him Maximo or some other ethnic version of Max. Hispanic lineage begs for a Latin name. My virtual friend Heidi's husband is Dominican, and her kids are named interesting and ethnically appropriate names, Cristian, Mateo, and Sarah.
Third, Christina Aguilera just named her baby Max. Everyone knows that people in the same ward can't name their children the same thing. It's politically incorrect. Well, it's like Christina and J Lo are in the Hollywood First Ward and J Lo needs to concede. I'm sure adorable Max Carter is the only Baby Max in his ward, right Ashley?
Next there is Emme. While Emme looks good initially, it has a few problems. First of all, Emme and Anthony both end in the eeee sound. I hate that. Emme Anthony. Didn't she practice saying Emme Anthony and discover that it was dorky to have a rhyming name? Why didn't she just name it Toni Anthony and get it over with?
Next, Emme sounds like a hum. Or a sound made when eating something delicious. Emmmme, I love chocolate cake. Since the parents are musicians, couldn't they come up with something more melodious?
Emme is a derivative of two perfectly good, albeit popular names, Emma and Emily, numbers one and two in the country for girls. J Lo's first name is Jennifer. She was probably one of five Jennifer's in her third grade class. If she had consulted BabyName Wizard or another statistical program, she would see that her child was also going to be one of many "Em"'s in her grade. After going through life having my name misspelled and mispronounced, I understand why someone might want their children to have a common name. I'm just glad I'm not like everyone else.
These are the names I would have chosen for the twins: Joaquin for the boy and Cecilia (of course) for the girl.
If have offended your delicate naming sensibilities, please leave a rebuttal in my comments. I'm interested.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Oh no, J Lo!
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34 comments:
I agree. Max Anthony and Marc Anthony are too similar for sure. And Emme is cute but no rhyming please. Now I want to hear what you would've named them.
Twin names are hard I think.
I agree wholeheartedly. I am glad I have a small army of people concerned with how I name my kids and I believe in consulting all data regarding name popularity. I must condemn anyone who is unimaginative enough to name their child something in the top ten. I defend Maxwell, by the way, as being 12 years before his resurgence in popularity. I have name opinions, people.
I have a brother that wanted to name his first daughter Emily Elizabeth. I had to stage an intervention and explain that there is already an Emily Elizabeth on PBS that has a Big Red Dog named, Clifford.
I agree with what you said about Christina and JLo being in the same ward. Very astute comparison.
I am going to consult you about names if I ever have another baby. I am scared to do the wrong thing, now.
I have very strong opinions on baby names and everything you said was spot-on.
Also, in your previous post, I had to ask my hubby if he took you to his senior prom. He came and looked at the picture and said he hadn't, because the dude in the picture had much sweeter hair than he did back then. And he grew up in Utah...
I must step in here and defend the names...to an extend. My 4 year old is Maxwell and so I guess I'm not in the protective status that Nor gave you for your Maxwell. I LOVE the name and it fits my "mad Max" perfectly. I liked having a not so common name, but I am a sucker for old traditional names..hence Ella, Jack, Max and Nora.
As far as Emme is concerned, I think it is an adorable name on it's own. I will agree with you that it does not jive with Anthony however. My last name has the Y (ee) sound at the end therefore there was no way I was using a first name that ended with that same sound.
I must say that the three times we have been to the dog park there has been at least one dog named Max, and one named Jack! So, my boys felt quite at home. Oh well, when people started using Sadie again it took me a few years before the first image I thought of wasn't a dog.
Whew!
I'm SO GLAD I didn't tell you my choice for my boy's baby name because I'm sure you would have found cracks in that name and then I would second guess myself through the whole L&D.
Although I will agree that it is quite funny that J-Lo's kids are named after the main characters in Dragon Tales. That is awesome.
celia. honestly, you kill me. i totally didn't even care what they named their kids, and now i'm all fired up about it after your post. that's either the mark of a good writer or an idiot reader.
i think they should've just gone with antoinette and antonio. cute twin names. they could start a whole new tony, toni, tone!
The Dragon Tales, I don't think I would have put it togehter! You are so clever.
Excellent post!!
OK...you know I have an Emmie. Actually it is Emily and I had no intention of using Emmie...but it just "happened" that way. And she is adorable so now I love it.
Also I have a Jake. Jacob and Emily were the number one names forever. When you grow up with an unusual name yourself, you are drawn to the Top Ten.
I'll let her know how you feel. I have a lot of pull... being both a twin mom, and a fellow latina.
Don't you like saying that? LATINA. (You have to say it with an accent to get the full effect.)
Your saying it, aren't you?? :)
Hey, it is a whole heck of a lot better than the people in my old ward in Eugene who named their son Luke Sky Walker.
Oh, that made for an interesting baby blessing.
As one of 13 Jennifer's in my Senior class...
Names can elicit such emotion. Who knew? I just chose names that would sound okay as kids and as adults. Actually, I'm not crazy about one of our names, but I figured my husband could have some say. (Big of me, I know.)
Having a ee sounding last name, I have purposely avoided all ee sounding first name.
You'll have to help her out by inviting to your playgroup next week.
At least they didn't name they Cleo and Max Anthony.
Ilene is pregnant, I think we should have a contest to name her baby, she might not be responsible enough to do it for her self. Sponser that contest, will you? I'll provide the treats.
For once, I am glad not to be famous. Though I totally agree with your assessments of her asinine choices, I can only imagine a similar, albeit hilarious, diatribe for the selection of Isaac.
Hollywood First Ward indeed, they really should have a name registry or at least rules. Just imagine if there were 3 Apples or some such nonsense!
I'm just glad it's not another Harlot or Harlow or whatever. You're going to poop your pants I fear when I pop out a Lola Lee. However, Lola Elizabeth sounds delightful, I think. I AM THE MOTHER TO A LOLA. I feel it in my bones.
Imagine this: Happy Holidays from Jason, Anne, Hazen, Lola and Brock (the dog) Lee.
Pure poetry. Plus, someone has to buy Heather's kids a dog.
You are correct in all your name assumptions, of course.
You will die--a girl in my ward had a boy Friday--2 weeks after me--and named him Max!!! The crazy thing is "Max" was ranked 66th in 2007--not even that popular. And lets not forget to add Trista Sutter (the bachelorette) to the list--her baby is "Max," too. The worst is Aguliara though.
I think they should have gone with Joaquin. But maybe I think that because I have a huge crush on Joaquin Phoenix/Johnny Cash. (Side note: I love Johnny Cash, but only when sung by Joaquin).
I think the first thing we have to remember here is that the mother of the baby goes by the name of J-Lo. I don't think we can give any credibility to her naming skills. Besides, next year she'll be divorced and hooked up with someone else. I give Hollywood no credit.
I have to agree. I grew up with an EE sounding first name AND last name. People always remembered me though. And I personally don't think it sounded that bad. But that's because I've heard worse.
When I was trying to get pregnant, I used to go to the hospital sites and look at all the new babies (pathetic, I know) and there was one baby who's name was Gracious Bubbles. I kid you know. Gracious Bubbles. I don't think it could get worse than that. Do you?
I had a Maxwell (but he is my Maximo) in July.
I'm super lame.
And Anne is not making an announcement about pregnancy although it sort of seemed like it. Maybe I will call her to double check.
And you forgot to mention Heidi's other son Tino (Justino). We call him Tino Bambino and I know he hates it.
You are right on with all of your naming issues. I do not like the double "e" sound in first and last names. Maren and Cole I love because they are different but not too wacky. The name Ethan made a huge jump in popularity and had I known that would happen I probably would have opted for a less common name. I however do not like the totally weird names though. It was nice growing up to be the only Bridget but it has never been a name I loved.
I may have heard the worst names. My boss, who is a rabbi, named her twin boys: Rafaello (Rafi) and Angelo. I won't write it here but they have an equally Italian last name and I fear they will be beat up when they get older.
My brother thinks that a cute name for his next son would be Buster. Like brown or like Buster Bluth. I do not approve.
I have passed judgment on all of the names above.
-- Lauren the Jewess
You are brilliant. Maybe you could start you own business. You could be the Star's Naming Agent. Obviously, it is in demand. (Or SHOULD be.)
I'm with you on the names too! Maybe she hasn't seen Dragon Tales? I think if they wanted to keep the names ethnic there are lots and lots of other great choices out there.
Kara Jayne, Heather, and Ashley: Maxwell is not the same as Max. I'm in charge. Also, Maxwell is currently ranked 149 and it only ever peaked at 132. It is still legal. And for the record, Max as a given name is less popular than Maxwell.
And Gab, you can only name responsibly, and I feel your pain on the spelling issues. You can't help what nickname the kid ends up with. Right Nor?
Lisa-Marie, do you think they'd take me? I'm a little obsessed. Always have been. Although I regret that Claire and Max are so popular, I stand by them, and I am particularly happy with Henry and Alice. Not that you asked....
Denae- it's not hard naming twins. The only rule is that they DON'T MATCH.
Okay, I guess I am living under a rock because I miss that she had her babies. But I totally agree with everything you wrote. I also laughed my butt off. O and I still need to get that book.
Ooh, I'm so a name snob. And twins? girlfriend! You had 40 weeks to figure this out! Step it up!
THIS WAS A HILARIOUS POST! Come on! The Hollywood First ward? Who comes up with that!?! I loved it. Plus... i need your celeb contact because I tivo e-news every night, and they have not once told me the names of those kids! They are fired!
I guess I am living under a rock cause I had no idea Jlo was prego with twins let alone already had them. And I agree, the EM names are too common these days - gotta steer clear of those as cute as they are.
I have to admit, the first thing I thought of was Dragon Tales, too. And, Emme Anthony is defintely too rhym-y. But, I do love the names Max and Emme, used separately. I'm biased, though, because we have an Emma (which is a family name) who goes by Emmie. We didn't plan to call her Emmie, it just happened. I have a feeling as she gets older, she will be Emma or Em, though.
I'm glad they didn't use off the wall names, as many celebrities tend to do. Those poor kids.
Jess
I have 10 days to go and I still can't decide on a name. I go by all the "rules"...no top 10...or 100. It has to sound good with the last name. It has to fit with the other siblings' names. It has to fit a child, a teenager and an adult. It can't be the same name as a child in the ward. It can't be the same name as one of the 30 cousins or 100 2nd cousins living in the same town. HELP! Actually, you already tried helping me and I am actually considering one of your name choices. Wish me luck! I hope you approve.
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