O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, you keep me oh so cozy.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, you warm my little toesies.
When husband's gone, you heat my bed,
Who needs a man, with you instead?
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, I'd never stoop so lowsie.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, don't exercise, it sucketh.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, metabolize no lucketh.
My muscles sore, my aching back,
No Advil works, I might try smack.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, I'd pay more than a bucketh.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, you help me with my baking.O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, the bread that I am making
Forgets to rise, stays small and sad,
You heat it up and I am glad.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, the Pillsbury is faking.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, I shouldn't use you too much.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, my skin won't like your hot touch.
This lady here, she did indulge,
It is not me, there is no bulge.
O Heating Pad, O Heating Pad, you are the cheapest health crutch.
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28 comments:
I knew that last picture wasn't you right away. No crack.
Just move to Arizona...we don't need no stinkin' heating pads here.
I never was a big fan of the heating pad. They made me hot. Go figure.
Cleva post, though. :)
I am so sad you are sore, but it will go away after a while. I love heating pads too.
Too funny. Are you on your period?
And what is in that baking dish? It looks like a tie-dyed shirt.
I love music Monday!! Please keep it up!
Yes, what IS in that baking dish? If it's food, I'm afraid I have to tell you it looks absolutely disgusting. And the woman's back with veins was an extra nice touch. You're a clever rhymer. Do you really raise your rolls with your heating pad?
I agree - what are you putting in your bread to make it purple and yellow? I think maybe that's why it doesn't rise...
Loved the song. Made me laugh.
Great idea for helping bread to rise. My house is too dang cold for dough to rise. Don't ask about turning on the heater, either. Long story... maybe I'll blog about it!
I don't know what the stuff in the pan is. I agree, it looks disgusting. I got it off the internet. No camera, remember? I do use a heating pad to make my bread rise. Yeast hates me and my house is cooooold. I don't really make bread though. I make Rhodes rolls. Fauxmade, remember?
Well, whatever that pan of stuff is, it's scary looking. Plus, didn't I tell you no Christmas until Friday? snuff. You may not celebrate prematurely in any way... Caroline said so.
Great post! Although I have no need for a heating pad as I live in AZ and as Lorena pointed out they're not necessary here. Maybe when I go to the bay area to visit the in-laws...it is chilly there.
I have never heard of using a heating pad for dough. Good to know!
We only have one heating pad in the house and all my kids want it...and so do I. I am addicted to the heating pad and to Mentholatum at night. Maybe that's why I could never get pregnant. Hmmmm...
I have never thought of a heating pad for helping bread rise - making homemade rolls (no Rhodes here so not fauxmade) tomorrow and might just use your trick.
I, too, have a heating pad and love it so much BUT can no longer use it. They've been linked to miscarriage.
Wa wah, along comes Debbie Downer!
Funny Rhymey
Well, I think the only time I've ever used a heating pad is when I was little and I use to get ear aches.
Oh Celia fae, Oh Celia fae, I think you are so clever.
Oh Celia Fae, Oh Celia Fae, stop reading you? Nope, NEVER!
That mid-section body heating pad looks awesome. Looking forward to more Holiday song-inspired poems.
I think I might need to invest in a heating pad.
I had to finally come back and comment since I can't get that stinking song out of my head. Not very annoying to walk around mumbling "oh heating pad...". But I have to admit, it is worth the laugh.
Love the song. I wish I could hear you sing it in person! I haven't used a heating pad in ages...I totally want one now!!!
three herniated discs in my back. intimately acquainted with my heating pad. well, not intimately. ew.
you are clever. and funny. i went to ross today and laughed out loud at the fact that i was laughing inwardly at a total stranger's old blog post concerning ross.
i have no life.
I just read this again (just becaues I love you so much) and it makes me laugh sooo hard. You are quite the funny poet, my dear.
I'd rate this post in your top 5 for sure.
No crack. . . that's hilarious!
Thanks a lot for the song stuck in my head. Problem is I can't remember all of your words so they get mixed up with the real words. Not Christmasy or warming.
Very funny! It is 26 degrees here in Washington - tell Jessica- so I will have to dig out my old heating pad. Especially for my Rhodes rolls in my freezer right now!
I have to tell you that my mom and dad came up from CA for Thanksgiving and I pulled up your Ross post (We are professional "Rossers" also) and we just about peed (is that how you spell it?) our pants laughing! Thanks for making our day, again and again!
P.s. Why are you hurting so bad?
That song is going to be stuck in my head all night. I think you should get it published. I think the heating pad companies would buy it! So perfect for this time of year, too!
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